"Hey can u check if that milk went bad?"
*milk has leather jacket on smoking a cigarette*
"It’s bad alright"
hickeys are beautiful because they are the only time a bruise results from love and affection rather than harm
at least i know nobody’s using me for my looks
I need to have as much wild sex as possible so one day I can become an inappropriate old lady that blurts out things like “when I was your age I got a concussion after being bent over a desk” and then my family can be like “grandma please, you’re making easter dinner really uncomfortable” and it’ll be great
date me its for a school project
i was making a lot of mistakes and then my archery instructor said:
“you make mistakes because you’re focusing on the target and not on your actions”
and i was like woah
thanks for giving me the best life advice i’ve ever gotten
guys just think about how applicable this is to EVERYFUCKINGTHING
if you tickle me it’s either going to lead to kissing or an extreme act of violence